One hell of a hot butterfly

The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them. ~Thomas Merton

I've said it before, there's a certain amount of change that we must endure in order to be in a healthy relationship...the key word here is healthy, because I believe that in a good, beautiful relationship the change that takes place is very much like the metamorphosis a caterpillar experiences as she becomes a butterfly.

The caterpillar begins as a creepy, crawly, icky little thing and becomes a beautiful, graceful, fluttering piece of art. That's how it should be in a relationship. You should be more by being loved by someone...more beautiful...more giving...more happy...just more.

But the change that takes place should be a change of nature, not of force. The other person shouldn't dictate the specifics of the change, they shouldn't force you to become someone else, because you will only become someone you don't know...someone you probably don't want to be...someone who will crumble if the relationship fails.

I've changed...in so many ways, I've changed. I'll be the first to admit that some of the changes I made were forced...I changed because of perception, not reality. But I learned, and I fixed it, and I became who I am today, and who I am is a strong, beautiful woman; I don't depend on anyone for my happiness, and I'm happier because of it.

It took me a long time to sort through everything that's happened with him, because quite frankly, there's a hell of a lot of stuff to sort through...but I crawled through it as a caterpillar and emerged as a butterfly...and I'm one hell of a hot butterfly.