O, C and L

O says I'm slipping.

C says my last blog began with a quote about an orgy (boys will be boys...)

And L recognizes my fussiness and restlesness and sees that I'm frustrated and happy all at once. A crazy combination.

Maybe they're all right...okay well obviously C is wrong, but O and L, they're probably right.

Maybe I am slipping, but to where? And why? And how? And is it a bad thing? Maybe I'm slipping into a happy place, a place where I've always meant to be but never knew how to find.
And clearly, I'm frustrated. But, again, why? I'm happy. Really and truly, I am. Am I curious what my future holds? Yes, but for the first time in a long time I can say that I'm happy.

Maybe I'm in a constant state of frustration; in fact I know I am. It goes back to that patience thing we've covered before. But that doesn't mean I'm not content and glad to be where I am right now, because I am. I'm proud of who I am. I think I'm fabulous. I am surrounded by incredible people who adore me and think I'm fabulous, too; how cool is that?

So why the frustration, you ask?

I don't know.

I honestly don't.

I'm restless. I know, I know, it stems from my impatience and my desire to know how it's going to end.

I have to quit that.

I know I do. So, I'm gonna say a few more prayers, take a couple more deep breaths and remember, that in the end, it'll all be okay.